Balancing Life + Work

I have been with my husband for 12 years. We have had good times and bad times like any other couple. We agree AND disagree on a lot of things. I moved up here from Long Island (we will get into that with a different blog) after Jake graduated college because he had gotten his full time job. I moved strictly for him. I never wanted to be that girl but I knew it was the right thing to do and we would figure it out. The one piece of advice my mom gave me before I moved was "Always respect each other. You will absolutely hate him sometimes and he will hate you but just respect where each other are coming from." That really stuck with me. After having children, my mom also gave me the advice to "keep living the same way you did before children because they will adapt to your lifestyle." That stuck with me also. Through all our years before children, we have definitely had major disagreements (many of my closest friends were there to experience them!) but we always respected each others opinion and respected the fact that we can't change how each person thinks. The biggest thing that has kept my marriage feeling stronger is always making time for each other. We date night every week (even during COVID). It's just really a night where you try to find time for each other!

If you are a parent, you know how EXTREMELY time consuming kids are. I swear some days I want to rip my ear drums out and hide in a corner because of the amount of times I hear "MOM....MOM....MOM". Sorry, that was aggressive. I have definitely been around them a lot lately! I think the biggest way that I balance life with kids is letting go. This is the hardest thing for a mom to do. The second that I was able to let go and ask for help from others around me, I became more sane. If I don't want to do bath night, I say "Jake, stop what you're doing...I don't want to do bath night". It's that simple but it took me a couple of years (and a second kid) to get to that point. I think mom's are overworked and under appreciated a lot. I do hate to say this but it's our fault a lot of the time. Just stop and ask for help. It's the best feeling ever!

I LOVE MY JOB!!!! I can't say it enough. It's stressful but it's so fulfilling because I love it. Never in a million years did I think I would own a store. It just kind of fell into my lap as the thing to do when I moved up here (again, we will get into this with another blog!). One of the biggest reasons I started my own business was to be in control of my life and my own hours. Everyone thinks a business owner HAS to work 24 hours a day. I work hard, you can see that on social media. It's not always easy but when I opened the store, I promised myself I would work within restricted hours and I wouldn't take work home with me. Sometimes I work longer hours but that's because I choose too. Nothing is so important that I can't choose to put it off until tomorrow so I am able to spend time with my husband, kids, or friends. Memories are really important to me. I head into work around 8am and try to stop by 4:30p so I can pick up the kids and focus on family time before they head to bed. During my work hours, I bust my butt! Sometimes I stray out of these hours because life isn't perfect and owning a business isn't perfect but I do the best I can and that's all that matters to me!

I guess the takeaway from this blog is to try to set boundaries for yourself and follow through on them. Set a weekly date night with your husband and don't let anything stop that from happening, ask your husband (or grandparents) to do one thing for your kids to take one thing off your plate and lastly, challenge yourself to give a hard stop time for work a couple of days a week. Life is too short and unpredictable. We only do it once!